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Forgive and Forget?
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Dee Ann

ip: 207.200.116.72
1. Forgive and Forget?
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Forgive and Forget?
Denial and repression do not relieve pain, they only bury it like toxic waste. When the truth of our pain, and unmet needs is addressed, people may receive genuine help for problems which were formerly buried in denial.
Date: 28 Feb, 2007 on 08:29 p.m.
Dee Ann

ip: 207.200.116.72
2. Re:Forgive and Forget?
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To tell someone to forgive and forget is not sharing in that person's burden. It's a quick and easy answer that does not help them hold their pain. The effect is to mimimize the person's pain and to put it back on them to hold alone. It comes very close to saying "Be warmed and filled" or telling a disabled person "you can do it if you just try harder." If someone had caused the loss of my leg, I may forgive them, but still not be able to walk normally. The effects of emotional injury are losses that are just as real as an amputation. They
don't simply disappear by forgetting what caused them.
The fact is, they MUST remember the pain in order to work through to resolution and forgiveness. Usually someone must help them by making it safe to look at the truth, by earning special trust, providing insight, validating the injury and supporting through recovery.
Date: 28 Feb, 2007 on 11:47 p.m.
vil

ip: 4.152.120.68
3. Re:Forgive and Forget?
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Quote DeeAnn...."The effects of emotional injury are losses that are just as real as an amputation. They
don't simply disappear by forgetting what caused them."

Dee you have a way of coming on board and introducing concepts without making them relevant to yourself.

So what caused your emotional injury?

Date: 01 Mar, 2007 on 12:03 p.m.
Dee Ann

ip: 207.200.116.72
4. Re:Forgive and Forget?
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(response to Vil's question) People with no Love.

LOVE is patient
LOVE is kind
LOVE does not envy
LOVE is not proud
LOVE is not selfish/rude
LOVE doesn't demand its own way
LOVE is not touchy/irritable
LOVE does not hold grudges
LOVE rejoices in truth
LOVE will be loyal
LOVE believes, bears, hopes, endures all things
LOVE NEVER FAILS
(1 Corinthians 13: 4-7)

(Vil's post) "So what caused your emotional injury?"[/quote]

Date: 01 Mar, 2007 on 04:26 p.m.
vil

ip: 4.129.82.150
5. Re:Forgive and Forget?
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Dee Ann (01 Mar, 2007 04:26 p.m.):
(response to Vil's question) People with no Love.

LOVE is patient
LOVE is kind
LOVE does not envy
LOVE is not proud
LOVE is not selfish/rude
LOVE doesn't demand its own way
LOVE is not touchy/irritable
LOVE does not hold grudges
LOVE rejoices in truth
LOVE will be loyal
LOVE believes, bears, hopes, endures all things
LOVE NEVER FAILS
(1 Corinthians 13: 4-7)

(Vil's post) "So what caused your emotional injury?"


[/quote]

Good grief, Dee! Talk about talking in symbols! What's your point? Come on, girl...spit it out!

Date: 02 Mar, 2007 on 11:17 p.m.
Dee Ann

ip: 207.200.116.72
6. Re:Forgive and Forget?
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Vil - Getting a wee bit angry there!

(Vil's post) Good grief, Dee! Talk about talking in symbols! What's your point? Come on, girl...spit it out![/quote]

Date: 03 Mar, 2007 on 12:08 a.m.
vil

ip: 4.129.82.150
7. Re:Forgive and Forget?
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Angry? No, but you are.

You're a mind#%&, Dee. All you do is play mind games and accuse me of how you are feeling hoping to start some crap on the board.

Not that you deserve the time it will take me to type this, but...

I remarked that you might as well be writing in symbols because you made a list that you found somewhere and left me to assume that you felt unloved in all those ways....that there was one person or several persons (unknown) who had no love at all in them for you without backing any of it up with personal examples.

A person would be a tool and a fool to just hand you a hankie based on that list so you can go on feeling like these unspecified and therefore unknown people can't love and don't love you based on readers being left to make an assumption garnered from someone else's list that you did not make personal to yourself...to do so would be like blindly joining a scapegoating lynchmob and telling the scapegoater they were OK.

You are quite good at staging a fight with your beating around the bush and generalization posts that you can then twist anyway you need to to feign victim status with other posters even when they have not intended to take you on in a fight.

I say, 'feigned victim status' because you are the one on this board who proclaims to be healed and happy all the time. You can't be both a victim and happy/healed as you say you are. Unless you are happy as a pig in slop to be unloved. :)...and that is why I say you are a mind#$&^...and that you play mind games. You are bouncing off both sides of the wall....and I personaly feel you open-end your words so you can choose which wall you need to bounce off first to covertly upset the status quo.

But I do enjoy your posts though, even if I do think you like to try to aggravate me. Good luck with that.

PS....glad you're not my sister...she'd be mean to her kid to aggravate me and hope to get me into a fight. At least you're only playing online.

Date: 03 Mar, 2007 on 01:27 a.m.
Forgive and Forget?
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